daydreams

"Daydreams were dangerous because they made her wish for things she could never have."

-Julie Garwood

Dreams

“If your dreams don’t scare you, they are not big enough.”

— Unknown

I'm scared that they wont happen, or worse, that they'll change. 

MATT CORBY

"Sleep now under my skin

Make sure you’ll try to

Conjure the wind

And ease my mind"

There aren't many singers out there that can conjure up this much emotion while performing every time  But time and time again Matt makes me feel his pain, intensity, and raw emotion. Its like im listening to the great, Bessie Smith or Billie holiday. The power and range in his voice is astounding. Everyday i listen to him, i can honestly say, that if i had to pick one artist that i had to listen to for the rest of my life, it would be his. 

It starts at around 0:47-6:50

Night time in Santa Cruz

For three years i was able to hear the shrilling screams of the fighting raccoons', the startling rustle of the leaves moved by the dear, the swaying and rocking of the redwood trees, the chirping of the crickets, the eerie calls of the crows, the various calls of the many beautiful and majestic birds, I was able to smell the sweet smell of the earth and smell as well as feel the piercing cold of the fresh air. I now can hear the busy streets of the town, smell the salty fresh air of the ocean, hear the crashing of the waves and listen to the calls of the seals. 

Santa Cruz, I love you.

My Ellen Experience

September 10th, 2012
4:50am, My cousins and I make our way to burbank to try and get there by 5:40-6am ti try and be one of teh first ones at the line. We had standby tickets, which meant that there was no guarantee that we would get in. However when we got there we were the second group.

8am: they gave out our standby number. after this we were able to leave and go eat.

12:30pm: we came back and waited until 2:00 to be lined up. Once we were in order according to numbers we made our way across the street to the warner bros lot. as we were crossing the one and only JIM PARSON (sheldon from the big bang theory) is in his little black honda. I love him so so so so much! i was tottally freaking out. he was so adorable. So once we are in the building we sit down and wait approx 10 mins and then we find out that of the standbys which were way more than 100. We were one of the only 12 that got in!!

3:30: Inside ellen's studio. Its everything i pictured it to be. It felt surreal, and yet at the same time it felt oddly familiar, seeing as she is the only thing i watch on youtube most days. the crowd was dancing and screaming. tony came out, and then the one and only ellen. she is so beautiful!! i couldnt believe we were there!! First up was Britney Spears and Simon Cowell!! we got Sony headsets that are worth over 300 dollars, and britney's fragrance.

Ellen then announced that we were getting a surprise and it was that later on the day after the show, we will be able to watch Finding Nemo 3D at the Capitan Theater and walk the red carpet!!

After PSY (gangman style) came out and we all danced! he taught britney how to do the dance.

then sophia grace and rosie came out. they are sooooooo cute!!!!!

after them a son and his father came on skype, and were given 20,000 dollars for their heroism during hurricane Issac.

There was not a moment when we didnt dance, laugh, or scream. It was amazing!!!!

After the show, ellen did a quick interview with mario lopez.

They then gave us the Nemo shirts that say "dude..ellen took me to the Finding Nemo 3d premire! we got cool 3D glasses, and then we made our way to the riff raff room where i bought an ellen sweater, and we made out way to the charter busses that would take us to the theater.

Once at the capitan theater we got off, and chanted just keep swimming until we got inside.

The day was sooo much fun and so exahsting. I didnt sleep bc i was studying for my final on thurs. and i still have hw. for tomorrow.

Oh ellen!! i love you so much more!!! <3

Chris Colfer

Okay, So i just got back an hour ago from Chris Colfer's book signing of The Land of Stories at the grove.
We left at 7am, got our wristbands at 10:30am saw Mario Lopez film EXTRA, and stayed in barnes and noble until 4:00pm to go make line, and then met Chris at 9:00pm, and got back home at 10:30pm.

It was amazing, i went with 2 of my cousins, and met 3 great girls. I cant even believe this actually happened. 15 hours of wait, and standing, but it was well worth it, and i will do it again. He is the sweetest person.

Chris: How ya doin hunny?
me: GOOD! Omg i love you so much and i loved the book, it was soo amazing.
Chris: oh thank you so much hunny!
me: oh! i made you a card.
Chris: oh thank you hun, (attempts to open it) i cant wait to read it!

ahhhhh. i was a total fan girl. i dont care, i just meat my idol! i wanted to hug him, shake his hand, but it happened so quickly!

two warblers were also there!!!! ahhhhhhhhh. \

Chris Colfer is perfect, i felt like he was my best friend.

This experience was beyond anything i could have ever imagined. i still cant fully process it.

-I SHALL POST PICS TOMORROW. IM TIRED AND WISH TO GO TO BED.

Crossroads

A call beyond the veil

The whispers of unanswered dreams.

Its melody calls out to thee

Saying, please come to me.

I listen to its entrancing song

Wondering which road I’m on

Its soft embrace envelopes me.

Haunting me with sweet, sweet reveries.

-Lily

Karaoke

So today, i went out with my two cousins, Vivian and Vanessa, to Max Karaoke studio in little Tokyo. Omg! it is amazing! You get your own little room, and you sing and you sing and you sing, LOUDDDDDLY. It was a mission getting there. Downtown LA, is not the easiest place to drive! but we eventually found it. $5 dollars per person for each hour, it was a sweet deal. it was AWESOME! OMG my cousins are HIGHlarious. We were all choking in the car banging our heads,dying of laughter!!! and then afterwards we drove all the way to the other side of town and ate at ruby's diner. yummm. great great day. :D i cant wait to go again!!! 

http://www.maxkaraokestudio.com/index.html

-lily

SPA day

Best friends, Belle and Sunny, went on a big adventure date to the spa. They got facials, nail trimming, body scrubbing, ear cleaning, and much more. Spoiled rotten with delicious doggie cupcakes, doggie cookies, and  chicken flavored treats. This was Sunny's first time, and he did amazing. Such a sweetheart to everybody. He was a great boy in the car, and they both ended up smelling tropically delicious. These two beautiful living beings are my life. <3 

-Lily

spirituality

Deep in the night,

the wind sings,

the flame dances.

we cant stop;

swirling, 

twirling,

spiraling.

deep in the center,

we slip into dreams;

exposed to the light ,

under the moon.

finally free,

This is magic.

This is me.

-lily

June 3, 2002

Happy birthday to the love of my life, my soul, my best friend, my baby, my everything. Belle, 

She has been there for me for 10 of the greatest most loved years of my life. She has showed me what unconditional love is and what true friendship is all about. My little old lady. I love her more than life. She truly is my everything. I wish she could have stayed 5 years old forever. I've seen the years creep up on us, and it breaks my heart. I cant imagine my life without her. she is the purest soul i've ever encountered. My spirit guide, that has helped me find my way. I feel connected to her in a way i can't explain. We are a part of each other, the best way i can make sense of it is in the way the Lyra and her dæmon Pantalaimon are connected in the book a Golden Compass. Pan is part of Lyra's soul. and neither can truly live without the other, the same way i couldnt truly live without Belle. She is my breath, my heart, my blood, and my spirit. I love you so much my darling Belle. 

-Lily

constant

Grasping to the threads of my imagination,
i am plagued by the ever constant notions of someone else's reality,
the sing song tune of death
and the ever constant daydream of my life.
-Lily

delusions

I just want to escape within the pages of my favorite books, and never come back. 


-Lily

I should be writing an essay..

So the weather has been beautiful here in Santa Cruz, and as of yet i have done nothing except stay indoors. 

I am so excited to be going home soon, so i can frolic around with my cousins and my doggies. 

I am most excited to see my cousin's new German Shepard puppy, JAVA! cant wait to play catch with her, and teach her some new tricks.  Things are great.

Oh i am long over previously said boy, LONG LONG over. 

haha.

Three more days until the parents visit me! <3

wavering heart

Mirror glimpses of an envisage world

a heart embarks in its escapades of love,

holding true, a harbor of hope

quickly diminished by its wavering thought

on to the next, 

hoping his time its true

-Lily

POTTERMORE

 POTTERMORE has finally opened!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ahhhhh and im MAGICAL!!! 

I knew it i knew it i knew it!!!!

OMG OMG OMG OMG 

Now im just waiting for my confirmation email to arrive

and then i will see what house i place in.

It better be 

GRYFFINDOR

 Ive waited so long for this!!!

-lily

UPDATE- I GOT INTO GRYFFINDOR!
"You might belong in Gryffindor,
Where dwell the brave at heart,
Their daring, nerve, and chivalry
Set Gryffindors apart…"


My whole life has been TRUE! <3

UP-UPDATE: POTTERMORE is like crack. beware

Irisdescent

Boy Band

Louis, Harry, Niall, Zayn, Liam

Never did i think i would fall for another boy band the same way i fell for the backstreet boys. But the boys from One Direction have stolen my heart. i am madly in love with all of them! I've caught the one direction infection.  Im so happy boy bands are rising back up. every little girl needs boy band posters in her room. i cant get enough of them. I was a fan of them when they were in x-factor, but aiden grimshaw had me distracted. haha i am now a full blown 1D fan. 

haha okay fan girl moment over. 

-lily

Spirit Animal

Our heart pounds, our soul awakens, 

We are wild, we are free, 

Embodied by nature

Coalesced together

Endowed with beauty

 Graced with Strength

Our souls are one

We are wild, we are free

-Lily

boy

So there is this guy, lets call him....James

He is seriously perfect. 

must stop being a five year old and have a decent conversation with him. 

-lily

Katniss Everdeen

Ever since i read the first book, i fell in love with this character. She is so empowering in her role as an intelligent, brave, and strong woman. I had my apprehensions when i first heard that a movie was being made. I had hopes that it will live up to the books like the harry potter movies did, but i feared it would be a lot like the Eragon movie adaptation, which didn't do the book justice. However, i was thrilled to see that it was an absolutely amazing movie. Jennifer lawrence has brought Katniss to life, and now serves as a positive role model to young girls, who are in need of a hero they can relate to. Katniss is up in the ranks of Hermione, from Harry Potter, and Elizabeth bennet, from pride and prejudice which are headstrong women that show the strength of the female power.

I also feel the message about standing up to the government is very relevant and insightful to our culture today.  I am completely obsessed. i never thought another book would have the same effect as the harry potter series or lord of the rings series had, but it has, the movie has only intensified it 10x more. I only wish that more people would take the time to read the books!

-lily

remember

Remember when we would run hand and hand?

Upon our faces, hopes of life vast and grand

We danced and laughed the day away

Hoping it would always stay this way

How beautiful life had seemed

When it all felt like a dream

-lily

Mr. Darcy

This look, makes my heart skip a beat and my legs weak.

Mr. Darcy, the things i would do to this man. 

he is such a dapper gentlemen, 

I don't have much hope of ever finding a man such as he. 

I know i was born in the wrong century. 

Only men like this make me truly swoon. 

beware of the upcoming Darcy posts. 

he has been haunting my every thought. 

-lily

William Francis

I need to see this man soon. 

-lily 

finals week

We have about a week and a half left of school, and i have an immense amount of work left to do. I have eight books im behind in for one class. i have no idea how thats possible but it is. i probably wont finish, but i will try my hardest. i have 3 essays left, one in class final for archaeology, that i am freaking out about (which i am also behind a ton of reading). and another in class final for my detective fiction class (which is the one with the 8 remaining books) that will consists of identifying passages, and writing two essays. 

Tonight i have to read a 300 pg book and write a rough draft that is due tomorrow.

i can keep going more about what i have to do, but im sure its as depressing to you guys as it is to me. so i shall go now, and continue reading, and hoping i finish by 3am so i will have 4-5 hours left before class to do my essay. 

panic mode: ON

-lily

tea time

i have six hours to finish my 3 page essay and my Egyptian hieroglyph translations. 

So i felt it was the perfect time to procrastinate some more and make myself a cup of tea.

Normally i enjoy it plain but today i decided to make it a english breakfast tea with water and milk plus a little bit of sugar. mmmmmm. its so good. i just love tea so much. 

I need to buy myself some jasmine white tea and some lavender tea. 

Oh how i miss my expensive delicious teas back home. if only i had a proper kettle. 

okay, 

wishing you warm bellies, and LESS sleepless nights.

-Lily

sunshine

Its such a beautiful day outside. I want to wear a dress, sit underneath a tree and just breathe in the fresh air!

Instead i'm indoors writing a paper. I really want to go hiking, swimming, bike riding,  any of the things i used to do my first year. At least if there is one good thing of me staying here this summer is that ill have more time to appreciate the beautiful weather here in santa cruz. 

-Lily

Fort

Good evening, so today was another beautiful day, and seeing as i had no classes. i decided to build myself a fort. I always do this back home and i don't know why i have never done it here, so i made one, and it was the most relaxing day ever! i opened up my window to let the sound of rain in, i open my curtain to enjoy the little daylight we had, i put beautiful instrumental music to relax to, turned on my Christmas lights, wrapped a pair of lights around my sleeping space, and i cuddled with my teddy. 

Now im reading some Jane Austen, and sipping on some Hot chocolate. I wish everyday could be like this!

Cant wait for friday! 

-Lily

Leap Year!

Its leap day!! and what a nice day it has been! 

The day has been absolutely beautiful. 

The leaves are bright green, 

the rain drops were wonderful! 

and the skies were the perfect shade of blue gray.

I just cant get over what a great day this has been!

Now i now why they call it leap day! because you just want to jump for joy!

and bonus points! tomorrows classes are cancelled! i hope i can get down to the base of campus so i can volunteer! and its almost friday!! 

Im not going to let the looming terror of finals dampen my spirits. 

Ive been watching hours of ellen degeneres, watched clips of one of my favorite actors', jackie chan! and watched many many lord of the rings clips and behind the scenes! <3

also! i ate THE best vegan ice cream ive ever had at the dining hall!

hurray!

okay, off to sing and dance some more

-lily

Pippa

I miss my lovely bunny so much! My room is so lonely without her.

I had to give her away due t0 various circumstances 

to a really cute little girl who i know will love her very much.

But i miss having that little trouble maker next to me. 

She would love licking my hand and face, 

she would jump on top of me, 

and run suuuuppppeeer fast, and do her little bunny binkies and she would flop everywhere!

she was such a happy bunny, and she made me so happy too. 

that little crazy girl pippa.

hopefully she is enjoying her new home and owners.

                                                                          

                                                                                                       (\__/) 

                                                                              (='.'=) 

                                                                              (")_(")

-Lily

vegan

I just realized today, that whenever lent was this year, i made it to my 4th year of being vegan! 

That's 7 years in total of not consuming any lovely animals.  <3

thank you santa cruz for being so kind to my needs!

love from a cruelty free 

-lily

animal companionship

the love and companionship an animal can bestow upon you, is like no other.

to have an animal love and trust you completely, i feel is the most rewarding thing.

To be able to connect with a species, so unlike your own, with no form of proper communication 

is astounding. 

Volunteering at the VCA, veterinary centers of america, has been so rewarding.

walking the dogs, loving them, and having them love you back is better than anything else!

I much rather enjoy an animals presence to that of a humans.

I can remember their name in an instant and remember their face distinctly upon meeting them

At the end of the day I never want to leave.

it alleviates the distance between me, belle and sunny, as well as my bunny pippa.

The dogs are such beautiful creatures. 

i wish i could lay in the sun all day with them, rubbing their warm bellies, and giving them endless kisses. 

santa cruz seems wondrously beautiful and peaceful when im around them.

I cant wait to see my own babies back home. 

Wishing you slobbery kisses and wet noses.

-Lily

animal

I often imagine myself as an animal of the wild, it feels more real than being a human. 

-Lily

homesick

i never thought i would ever be this homesick. ever. but i am. terribly terribly so. i just want to quit college go home and be with my mommy. 

Luna

          So over the holiday break, on New Year's Eve, a little dog wandered into our garage. My whole family was there, and since it was cold my dad let her stay there while we were celebrating. The next day she came back to the garage, and my dad noted that she had slept in some bushes. I begged my dad to let her stay the night in our garage, and in the end, he complied. She stayed with us about a week. At first my cousin and i had named her cleo, but soon, with the help of my mum and pop, we all decided that Luna fit her better.

Here she is

          Luna. I tried so hard not to get attached to her. My mum would never allow us to get another dog. So i didnt want to fall in love with her, however, this sweet little lady was just to cute to resist. She reminds me so much of my doggie belle. Those soulful brown eyes and her sweet and mellow temperament. I felt that turning her away, was like turning my Belle away. It was also amazing that she and belle got along very well.

Since neither my cousin or i could keep her, we tried super hard to find her a home, and thankfully, my cousin's friend did. It was an older lady, who had one dog, and wanted a companion for him so he can play.            

        As elated as i was that we had found luna a home, i couldn't help but worry that maybe luna had a family already. But we tried finding her home and she would always end up sleeping in the bushes or running into our garage.
       It was heat breaking! She was so used to us, that when we dropped her off at my cousin's friends house, her eyes, were screaming out to us no to leave her. The friend said that she barked at them and wanted to leave, so that made me even more worried, however, today i got word from my cousin saying that luna has settled in very well in her new home and that she gets along very well with her new friend.  Im so happy for her, and i will never forget her. <3

I wish you all belly rubs, and snuggly times in your new forever home Luna, 

-lily

Christmas Spirit

So i thought i had posted this, but it had just saved to drafts. haha so here it is weeks later. 

So i am here drinking some hot cocoa, admiring my handy work! i just finished bedazzling the house with Christmas decorations! Our house and the Christmas tree looks beautiful! Christmas is my absolute favorite time of the year! I LOVE setting up the Christmas tree. Im vegan, and an environmentalist, but when it comes to Christmas trees, they always have to be real. Its been our tradition, and it is one thing that i wont change for the sake of the earth. haha.  I love the smell and the feel of real trees. I tried getting my family into the Christmas spirit, but nobody loves decorating, and singing for Christmas the way i do. I was practically forcing my parents to decorate. Not fun. Our Christmas spirit meter is zero! :( However i wont let that dampen my spirits. For a couple of years now, i havent enjoyed christmas like i used to. Ive let their lack of interest ruin my spirits, but not this time! i shall be like buddy the elf, and spread christmas joy! haha  i cant wait to own my own house, and have a whole lot of different ornaments, and colorful lights. I love a colorful Christmas tree with interesting ornaments! Our tree is a little boring this year, the lights are mainly red and white and so are the round ornaments, however, I love our other figure ornaments, each one is a piece of history and a memory. I love going through each one and remembering the past. The christmas tree, along with the hot cocoa, and christmas music is something that was always very special to me, but now im the one who loves it. My mom hates it because the tree takes up too much space and it makes our small living room look smaller, my sister never really liked decorating it, and my dad likes it, but i feel they all just force themselves to to this because i persist so much. I sometimes just want to say to forget about the whole thing, but i love it way to much. :)

so this is a crappy photo of our Christmas tree. but here it is!

wishing you warm bellies and christmas spirit

Lily the elf